July 07, 2018

Preparing for Life After Divorce

Opening to the new day

 

Divorce is one of the most stressful events in a person’s life.  Whether you wanted the marriage to end or not, you are most likely going to experience an entire gamut of emotions. The thought of ending ties with someone you thought you were going to spend your life with is something with which you must come to terms.

Divorce Considerations with Children

If you and your ex-partner have children, you may undergo an entire new set of feelings and emotions. Whether you have sole or split custody, being a single parent is stressful, taxing, and complex. The sooner you prepare yourself for life after divorce, the better you and your children will be.

Put Yourself First

There is a popular saying, “If Momma ain’t happy, no one is happy.” The same holds true for dads. Before you can successfully take care of someone else, you need to take care of yourself first. We are useless in the workplace or to our family if we are not taking care of ourselves.

Suggestions for Taking Care of Yourself

The first steps to preparing a “Post-Divorce You” is to come to terms with the divorce.  Realize you will have your good days and your bad days, and allow yourself plenty of time to grieve. At the same time, work on yourself in these positive ways:

  • Seek therapy for your mental well-being.
  • Stick to a regular sleep regime and get at least 8 hours of rest.
  • Eat a healthy diet of fruits, vegetables and protein.
  • Start or continue an exercise routine.
  • Make time for friends.
  • Pick up a new hobby or join a new club.
  • Surround yourself with positive support role models.
  • Focus on the positive, find something to be grateful for each day.

Take Care of the Kids

Your kids are counting on you, and you need to be a strong support model to take care of them. Depending on the ages of your children as well as other factors, some kids handle divorce better than others. Here are some ways you can help your children cope with divorce:

  • Talk to them in age-appropriate wording.
  • Share only necessary details.
  • Listen to their concerns and address them without providing false hope.
  • Avoid talking badly about their other parent.
  • Continually remind them how much you love them.
  • Offer them counseling or someone neutral to engage with.
  • Start new traditions.

Divorce is not the End

When you come to peace, you will realize that divorce is not the end; it was a chapter in your life and now you have a second chance to live a different life. Make the best of this chance by taking time for yourself and working on things or choosing new activities you never had the chance to do before.

Choosing a Divorce Lawyer

If you have a great divorce lawyer, he or she has your best interests in mind.  When you are going through a divorce, or if you have already signed papers, you want to know your divorce attorney is on your side.

If you need representation for you divorce, are already divorced and need a new divorce lawyer, or have questions, Mendes Weed, LLP is here to help. Our Walnut Creek office serves clients in Danville, Alamo, Walnut Creek, and the surrounding areas, and we’d like to help you, too.

Call us at (925) 390-3222 or contact us on our website.

Disclaimer: The tips and materials provided on this page are for informational purposes only, offered as public service. No information on this website should be considered legal advice or used as a substitute for legal advice. For legal advice, you should contact an attorney directly.